Martha Oh Dear! (with apologies to the White album)
ROUND 3
ROOSTERS V MOUNT MARTHA MOUNTAIN GOATS
@ the nursing home
Saturday October 20th 2012
A glorious sunny day greeted our 4 coq sure Roosters – The line-up was the Greek part 1, teamed up Bikie Kneel, Comrade Yuri and Hun smoke aka St.Nick.
The Greek set the tone low and early when he arrived with the Long & Hard “shirt-gate” statement. His fashion decisions and playing standard for the day are to be excused as he was suffering jet lag from travelling into far north Coburg the previous week and was still recovering from such a long journey out of the Bayside area – with no electrical aids too.
The boys from Mt Martha had travelled even further and were chaffing at the bit to get going right on 1pm. So away we went. A good home crowd had gathered with Alan and Kerri, Vic and Club Committee heavy weights, Michael & Peter and several others (Indie, Peter?) all in support.
So under a barmy 24 degrees with little wind but lots of hot air around, the matches got underway. It was clear within 10 minutes that the pair playing Yuri and Nick had played tennis before....lots of tennis! There was more spin going across the net than a politician playing Virtual tennis on Play station 3. (copy-write is pending on that joke!).
And before you could say “Lets get a Plasma TV for the clubhouse” we went down 6-2. On the other court, Kneel and Dennis were toiling away, but when a comment was overheard from our boys “look, we haven’t lost yet” – clearly the signs were not good. And they didn’t get better.
At the wash-up of the first matches – Yuri and Nick had scrapped together 4 games only (losing 6-2 6–2) . While on show court 1, Dennis and Kneel were faced with the prospect of living with the dreaded “Donut King” going down like a sack of donuts 6-2 6-0.
But it didn’t go all Mt Martha’s way, for the Rooster Captain verbally grabbed the moral high ground immediately after the first match as Yuri politely explained to our opponents that the ball had stayed low on a point (that they called “out” during Nick’s serve) because that is what happened when the balls hit the line at this club – you had to be there to hear it!
Onto the reverse doubles. It could only get better right? But no, Summer season is NOT Winter season and there in no place for mercy. No where to hide. Bravely, our lads picked up their racquets and the boys went into battle again. But with little impact on the scoreboard (imagine throwing a ping pong ball at a windmill).
I think our plight was best summed up deep in our second match and deep in the second set when Shannon (aka “The Rock” from Mt Martha) who had not missed a forehand all day, smashed another bullet at us to win another point, Yuri, was heard to yell across to the spectators “Can you warm up the oven” – clearly we were not long for the court and arvo tea was on the way.
At the wash-up, both pairs had lost in straight sets again, but at least there were no more donuts. While on the subject of food, the Greek decided that if we could not improve our tennis, then at least our afternoon tea could be upgraded. Never one to pull a punch, he surmised the teams’ arvo tea offering on the table (3 of the 4 offerings were buns), and said that “Our afternoon tea is sh_t boys, everyone needs to spend $15 each on a decent spread next time.”
Ah...........if only we could also buy a win in this brutal Summer season too..........
Guys 3 Boston Buns does not equal a dignified post match spread. Shame on you cheapskates!
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| We should have poisoned them BEFORE the match |
NEXT UP
Hit Up Thursday 6.30 as usual
Hit Up Thursday 6.30 as usual
a four would be dandy!
October 27 V Port Melbourne Pillow Biters
@ the Port Warves
@ the Port Warves
Al Brian ? + Dennis
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| and wide LOL |
SOME SHAMELESS SELF PROMOTION
MARGARET FULTON: QUEEN OF THE DESSERT
Discounted tickets for Yuri's musical (hey he's NOT gay right!) are $30 (normally $45)
Roosters + partners night is Thursday 22nd November 8pm at Theatreworks Acland St St Kilda. Let Yuri know if you want to come.
Just hop onto margaretfultonmusical.com and purchase your tickets and remember:
select Thursday 22nd November
select Concession ($30)
when asked for your concession details on the night just say you're with the Albert Park Tennis Club and bingo!
BTW if you want to support this musical go to pozible.com/fulton
SUMMER ROOSTER 2012-13
October 6 V Mornington Rider Sea Slugs @ the nursing home 4-0 LOSS
Mark Yuri Vic and Alan Dennis Brian Deano
October 13 V Black Rockstar Bastards @ away
Alan Nosti Yuri Mark Dennis Brian Deano Vic Neall Nick 4-0 LOSS
October 20 V Mt Martha Mountain Goats @ the nursing home
Nick Neall Yuri Dennis Brian Deano Vic Mark Nost 4 -0 LOSS
October 27 V Port Melbourne Pillow Biters @ away
Alan Brian Dennis Yuri Deano Vic Naell Nosti Mark
November 10 V Highett Hillbillies @ the nursing home
Deano Vic Mark Alan Dennis
NOVEMBER 11 PORT CUP@ Elstenwick
Yuri Neall Mark Deano?(we need 8)
NOVEMBER 16-18 CLUB CHAMPIONSHIPS@ the nursing home
See Notice Board
November 17 V Glenhuntly Girls @ away
Nick Yuri Brian Neall Dennis Deano
November 24 V Mordialloc Morons @ the nursing home
Nick Dennis Vic Nosti Deano
December 1 V Mornington Rider Sea Slugs @ away
Vic Yuri Neall Mark Deano
December 8 V Black Rockstar Bastards @ the nursing home
Brian Nick Dennis Nosti Deano
December 15 V Mt Martha Mountain Goats @ away
Yuri Alan Brian Neall Deano
February 2 V Port Melbourne Pillow Biters @ the nursing home
Nick Deano
February 9 V Highett Hillbillies @ away
Nick Deano
February 16 V Glenhuntly Girls @ the nursing home
Nick Deano
February 23 V Mordialloc Morons @ away
Deano
February 23 V Mordialloc Morons @ away
MARCH 2 SEMI FINAL @ TBA
Nick Brian + best
MARCH 16 PRELIM FINAL @ TBA
Nick + best
MARCH 23 GRAND FINAL @ TBA
Nick + best
Comments
Never mention "the war" or "turning the oven on" to your German partner
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